Very nice reading and great rithm. The running scene is really involving and I wanted to know the reason of that hurry! My advice is avoide camera shots as much as you can. It director's business,
not writers'. Think you didn't make the long list because there isn't the kiss they wanted. Anyway I really enjoyed it.
#2
Ava(Tuesday, 31 July 2012 11:32)
Well done Sara-Ellen! you went for it! See you at the next festival
#3
Iain(Monday, 06 August 2012 19:03)
Good one Sara-Ellen, The way it started I did think it was going to be a bit similar to the start of trainspotting, a really nice twist at the end. Good job...
#4
Ste(Wednesday, 08 August 2012 22:32)
Original, funny, good twist at the end. Shame it didn't get selected. It should have done
#5
vicky(Wednesday, 15 August 2012 01:13)
Love the momentum, it makes you want to be engaged in the action. The kiss at the end was a fun twist. But as francesca said probably not the type of kiss they envisaged.
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francesca (Friday, 27 July 2012 10:20)
Very nice reading and great rithm. The running scene is really involving and I wanted to know the reason of that hurry! My advice is avoide camera shots as much as you can. It director's business, not writers'. Think you didn't make the long list because there isn't the kiss they wanted. Anyway I really enjoyed it.
Ava (Tuesday, 31 July 2012 11:32)
Well done Sara-Ellen! you went for it! See you at the next festival
Iain (Monday, 06 August 2012 19:03)
Good one Sara-Ellen, The way it started I did think it was going to be a bit similar to the start of trainspotting, a really nice twist at the end. Good job...
Ste (Wednesday, 08 August 2012 22:32)
Original, funny, good twist at the end. Shame it didn't get selected. It should have done
vicky (Wednesday, 15 August 2012 01:13)
Love the momentum, it makes you want to be engaged in the action. The kiss at the end was a fun twist. But as francesca said probably not the type of kiss they envisaged.