Her and Him by Chris Mueller Draft 2
Draft Two Comments... have YOUR say!
Her and Him by Chris Mueller Draft 1
Draft One Producers Development Notes for the author
1. Take out the “Joss Whedon Rules” T-shirt – difficult to source, possible copyright issue.
2. Film makers, please talk to the writer about getting this made in order to fully understand the backward nature of this piece
Have your say, what do you think?
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#1
Stylish and very well visualized.
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#2
I like this, it's a cool concept and it's growing on me the more I think about it. I think having CUPID and HOST amongst the onlookers in the first scene would be a nice touch, Cupid's nonchalance and Host's incredulous smile hinting that they know something the other onlookers don't.
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#3
Brilliant concept and well executed - love the reverse chronology - I do like Damian's suggestion at No. 2, as the icing on an already delicious cake - congratulations!
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#4
Brilliant! Love the structure, and the audacity!
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#5
thanks for the reads - and glad to see some love for the structure!!! hope there were some laughs in there as well
panning past cupid/host as a little easter egg in the crowd scene, prior to the final reveal, is a cool little directorial choice
assuming at least a few filmmakers choose to make this their film, i will be interested to see the various interpretations
and i hope that 50 Kisses creates a YouTube page or similar site where the filmmakers who don't make it into the final film can post their vids so we writers can see what they did
thanks again for the comments! -
#6
I like this, good and funny.
Is it a fancy dress party? I think it should be so Cupid could look like Cupid and not look out of place.
I think your timings are a bit off, only jumping back a few seconds each time, But I guess the filmmaker will have to get that right and will have the right times after the edit.
But when you do jump back I think you should have a new scene.
This will look good on film. -
#7
Well done. Nicely laid out.
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#8
Good story, well written. Agree with Craig about making it a fancy dress party, and the deserved praise for your structure.
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#9
Everyone, thanks for the comments and notes.
I think what's great about this contest is how the filmmakers will interpret the scenes.
Do they go with a fancy/costume ball, an outrageous rave or casual party? Is Cupid a slob or child-like or Denzel/Clooney handsome? Are the nerds clichéd or nuanced?
Kept a lot of it open/generic precisely for those varied interpretations. Hope the filmmakers have fun with this. Looking forward to seeing the final films.
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#10
Like the fact that you follow up with the comments and interact. Original one. Congratulations. Agree with Craig about the timing. And good idea about the cupid and the host at the first scene.
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#11
Your writing style stands out. It was fun to read.
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#12
Thanks again Stare and Laura. Regarding the timing, yeah, it's off, was just using prime numbers as place holders - like Craig above stated, I was counting on the filmmakers to use their real times - who knows, someone may use something like the second hand of a clock or an iPhone to show the 'rewind' of time instead of on-screen text. That could be cool.
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#13
Great little script. Love the cliche characters, lots of fun to be had with this one. On the list for sure!
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#14
Cute story; I liked the retrograde aspect. Full of the toaboo and forbidden clever Shane Blackisms, but I guess they worked because it is a winner. Good job.
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chris m (Monday, 20 August 2012 00:12)
Draft 2 note: only one change in this version of the script - the "Joss Whedon" t-shirt was removed at the request of 50 Kisses (so no copyright issues for filmmakers).