'Never Forget' by LCB Films

First Edit

Read 'Never Forget' HERE

First cut: Producers notes for the filmmakers

  • Sort out your aspect ratio
  • Needs a grade
  • Add some foley to help create a world
  • Reveal at end needs tightening
  • Could use a gun shot effect too, to seal the story

First Cut Comments... have YOUR say!

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Comments: 6
  • #1

    Michael W. Penny (Thursday, 08 November 2012 23:29)

    I believe your aspect ratio is stretched too far, yes?

    I appreciate you holding back the reveal as to why the guy is going to kill himself until the very end. It drags a little for me on all these bar scenes (perhaps shaving them a bit will better the pace? These scenes run from 01:32 to 02:23 and it feels really slow), but it's interesting to wonder what's wrong with him until the last seconds. If you can tighten up these bar scenes, I believe you could strengthen your film and even get it under the 2 min mark.

  • #2

    Will (Friday, 09 November 2012 00:14)

    Trimming the bar scenes would be a good idea.

    Maybe try and have the reveal of the gun going to the head in or at the end of the montage rather than at the beginning to see if that make more of an impact. & possibly the rose drop in the montage too

    Have a look at the aspect ratio

    I like the montage idea and I think the guy is good, nice interpretation of the script.

  • #3

    Dan Price (Friday, 09 November 2012 04:20)

    Hey Carolina. I love your end montage interpretation. We had to be super faithful to the script in our camp what with the writer being a producer / lead actor and all :)

    I know people have mentioned the bar scenes but you could afford to tighten quite a bit during the first half too.

    For example, the gap between "Never forget that ok?" and "what are you talking about?".

    What is the shot at 1:52 of?

    Again, I love the montage idea and it turned out great.

  • #4

    Stephen Cooper (Friday, 09 November 2012 07:52)

    Would go along with the suggestions of just tightening it all up a bit. Feel there is a few shots in the first part that could be cut by a second or two and the same at the bar scene.

    Not sure if it would work but maybe a loud jarring gunshot at the end would add a final punch to the story. Again, not sure if it will work but maybe someting to take a look at.

  • #5

    Rocko Paolo (Friday, 09 November 2012 15:01)

    I liked this. A few framing shots could have been tighter like when he is holding the rose and not sure if it was shot in two different locations but the background when the actor is facing us and the one when he is on the balcony do not match. I like the music at the end and feel a quiet music piece could have been used at the beginning with a build up for tension.

  • #6

    Carolina Rodrigues (Friday, 16 November 2012 02:25)

    Thank you all for your comments, I've already took a lot of what you said under consideration